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    Gobble Gobble

    Gobble Gobble

    Posted by John Kaplar on

    Go shop Festified, and go shop now!

    Only at Festified will you find

    Baubles for [wine] bottles, and boots bedecked with bouncing reindeer.

    Bespectacled beauties

    Love our leggings

    Especially when they’re sweggings!

    Go shop Festified, and go shop now!

    Only at Festified will you find a

    Brown, Lighted Thanksgiving Turkey Sweater for the special

    Boy in your life. He’ll bawl and he’ll bellow; he might even

    Laugh a laugh filled with liveliness, and

    Exclaim, “Happy Thanksgiving to all, and to all a goodnight!”

    ——

    It’s clear he’s a little confused about which of the upcoming holidays is which, but the man is just so darn excited about Thanksgiving, and we can’t blame him.

    Today marks the first Thursday in November. Three weeks from now — on the fourth Thursday in November — crowds will gather around dinner tables, and in front of television screens. American people everywhere will feast, on too much food, and too much football.

    But did you know?

    You can have your turkey, and wear it, too!

    Holidays with the family can be tense; no one knows that to be more true than Beth. For the first time this year, Beth is bringing a boy home for Thanksgiving. She’s nervous, and so is he. Will they like him? Will they like me? Only time will tell.

    (Hold on tight. We’re about to do some time traveling.)

    A few weeks have passed, and Thanksgiving is tomorrow. Beth and her boyfriend have just checked into the hotel they’ll call home for the next few days; if they’d stayed in Beth’s childhood home, her dad would have made Tom sleep on the couch in the basement, and nobody wants that. It’s dark and damp, and crazy cousin Jerry… You don’t know what to know what he’s up to down there. I digress —

    “I guess we’re not going out for dinner.”

    Beth laughed, “Nope. These Holiday Reindeer Sweggings are soooo comfortable.”

    Tom rolled his eyes.

    “I’m starting to think you’ve got a problem. A sweggings problem.”

    “No such thing. Hey, I got something for you to wear tomorrow. Look!”

    “What… what is it?”

    “It’s a Lighted Thanksgiving Turkey Sweater from Festified! LED lights rise as steam from the turkey; tell me it’s not the greatest thing you’ve ever seen!”

    He bawled and he bellowed; he laughed a lively laugh, and exclaimed, excited, “Happy Thanksgiving to all, and to all a goodnight!”



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